force them at gunpoint

The problem with the American comic industry is that it's a monopoly-dominated niche market designed to supply junkies - I mean, "fans", with the latest fix - I mean, "adventures", of their favorite heroin - I mean "superheroes". Oh no, not me, I don't read superhero comics, I read "graphic literature" about muscular men who beat up villains and monsters and never have to pay the mortgage or go to the dentist. Anyway various plans have been devised to get the American public back to reading comic books again like they did in the 1950s. Most of these plans have not bothered to include "producing comics Americans actually want to read" or "getting these comics in places Americans actually go". Other than Archie, which continues to thrive. But occasionally promotional plans will emerge to try and engage the vast non-comic-reading public in reading comics. One of these is "Free Comics Day", in which publishers - get this - PRODUCE AND PRINT COMICS FOR FREE and send them to Diamond, who then SELLS THEM to comic shops, who then GIVE THEM AWAY FOR FREE. It's a great plan that can't fail to make money - if you're Diamond. Everybody else is getting screwed.

Anyway one of these free comic books was a giant messy wall of text full of advice on getting people who don't normally read comics to read comics.



"Christa Shermot's 100% Guaranteed How To Manual For Getting ANYONE To Read Comic Books" fails out of the gate by having perhaps the most unwieldy title ever. Shain takes it to task this week at Stupid Comics!

Apparently "Christa Shermot" was a character in another comic book called "Fade To Blue". And "Young Guy Who Thinks He's Too Cool For Comics" is Jet Black from Cowboy Bebop, or at least shares his barber. Free Comic Book Day apparently continues, however. Hooray for monopolies!